Imagine you have told a client he can call you with any of his questions from 9-5.
Recently he’s been calling you at 8,9, 10 or even 11 pm. This is starting to take a toll on business, health and personal life.
Thinking is made up of 28 thinking skills, that we use to do almost every activity - including setting boundaries.
Out of the 28 thinking skills, there 3 are that you would use most to set clear boundaries, labeling, being precise and showing self-control.
So, let’s break it down.
Labeling is about using correct labels for items, ideas, places etc.
In order to set a clear boundary, you’re going to need to label all part of your boundary really clearly. People may not understand your labels, as a lot of it depends on culture, how they grew up or even assumptions.
Here’s an example for an email copywriter:
"Clients can call during normal business hours which are 9 am - 5 pm EST. Except for emergencies which include getting more then 10 hate emails from one broadcast. or losing more than 3% of subscribers from an email."
Notice how I explained what an emergency is.
Let’s give another example:
"I have a meeting in conference room 3 from 2-4 pm, please do not come in or knock on the door during that time."
Labeling conference room 3
You’ve got to be precise in the words you use.
The more explicit and precise you are about your boundaries the more people will be able to listen to them.
In the email example, I didn’t just say “if you get hate emails.” I said if you get 10 hate emails. I’m being precise about it. Otherwise, someone who get 2 hate emails will consider that an emergency and the email is simply doing its job by provoking emotions. 10 already means it going a bit too far and we need to do something about it, to me that’s an emergency, so you can call.
In the second example I added in “don’t knock on the door” because do not disturb may not be explicit enough. (Yes! This just happened a few days ago.)
Showing self-control is a thinking skill which will be used when people test your boundaries, because people will.
You’ve got to show self-control and not fall in when they test it. They are going to do this a lot in the beginning, but over time they will learn (and you will learn) and it will become a whole lot easier.
The client calls you at 8 pm about getting 3 hate emails? Do not respond. Even (or especially!) if you are available because next time, they are going to call you are not going to be available and they’ll be even more upset.
You may think you are setting a clear boundary, but because of the person’s weak thinking skills they may struggle to understand what you mean.
It is your responsibility to understand them and talk to them in the way they understand.
if they aren’t listening to your boundary, take the time to figure out what is the disconnect in the way you are expressing your boundary and the way they understand it.
Once you understand this concept (and actually implement it) setting boundaries will be a lot easier.
Your challenge for this week is to set a clear boundary using these 3 thinking skills.
Cheers to Peak Brain Performance!
Most entrepreneurs want to grow their business but already got a lot of stress.
At LifePix University we help you rewire your brain to become more efficient and effective while experiencing more inner peace.
Learn more here.
This guide will give you all you need to start improving your cognitive functions. Learn what all 28 thinking skills are, how they apply to you and what you can do today to begin improving them.
Thinking is not one big thing. Thinking is made up of 28 parts, called cognitive functions.
Take the FREE assessment to see where each of your cognitive functions are currently at.
Can you help us reach our goal?
Share this podcast with someone you love!
Imagine you have told a client he can call you with any of his questions from 9-5.
Recently he’s been calling you at 8,9, 10 or even 11 pm. This is starting to take a toll on business, health and personal life.
Thinking is made up of 28 thinking skills, that we use to do almost every activity - including setting boundaries.
Out of the 28 thinking skills, there 3 are that you would use most to set clear boundaries, labeling, being precise and showing self-control.
So, let’s break it down.
Labeling is about using correct labels for items, ideas, places etc.
In order to set a clear boundary, you’re going to need to label all part of your boundary really clearly. People may not understand your labels, as a lot of it depends on culture, how they grew up or even assumptions.
Here’s an example for an email copywriter:
"Clients can call during normal business hours which are 9 am - 5 pm EST. Except for emergencies which include getting more then 10 hate emails from one broadcast. or losing more than 3% of subscribers from an email."
Notice how I explained what an emergency is.
Let’s give another example:
"I have a meeting in conference room 3 from 2-4 pm, please do not come in or knock on the door during that time."
Labeling conference room 3
You’ve got to be precise in the words you use.
The more explicit and precise you are about your boundaries the more people will be able to listen to them.
In the email example, I didn’t just say “if you get hate emails.” I said if you get 10 hate emails. I’m being precise about it. Otherwise, someone who get 2 hate emails will consider that an emergency and the email is simply doing its job by provoking emotions. 10 already means it going a bit too far and we need to do something about it, to me that’s an emergency, so you can call.
In the second example I added in “don’t knock on the door” because do not disturb may not be explicit enough. (Yes! This just happened a few days ago.)
Showing self-control is a thinking skill which will be used when people test your boundaries, because people will.
You’ve got to show self-control and not fall in when they test it. They are going to do this a lot in the beginning, but over time they will learn (and you will learn) and it will become a whole lot easier.
The client calls you at 8 pm about getting 3 hate emails? Do not respond. Even (or especially!) if you are available because next time, they are going to call you are not going to be available and they’ll be even more upset.
You may think you are setting a clear boundary, but because of the person’s weak thinking skills they may struggle to understand what you mean.
It is your responsibility to understand them and talk to them in the way they understand.
if they aren’t listening to your boundary, take the time to figure out what is the disconnect in the way you are expressing your boundary and the way they understand it.
Once you understand this concept (and actually implement it) setting boundaries will be a lot easier.
Your challenge for this week is to set a clear boundary using these 3 thinking skills.
Cheers to Peak Brain Performance!
Most entrepreneurs want to grow their business but already got a lot of stress.
At LifePix University we help you rewire your brain to become more efficient and effective while experiencing more inner peace.
Learn more here.
This guide will give you all you need to start improving your cognitive functions. Learn what all 28 thinking skills are, how they apply to you and what you can do today to begin improving them.
Thinking is not one big thing. Thinking is made up of 28 parts, called cognitive functions.
Take the FREE assessment to see where each of your cognitive functions are currently at.
Can you help us reach our goal?
Share this podcast with someone you love!